Attention Is Love

My entertaining philosophy has always been deeply rooted in my desire to make others feel at h(om)e. I strive to create a warm, inclusive, and thoughtful space that invites my guests to kick back and relax into themselves. For me, the art of entertaining lies in the small gestures that demonstrate how much I care.

The brunch I hosted for my friends last weekend was no exception. I pulled out all the stops, including almost every piece of china I own. I set up a make-your-own Blood Mary station on my bar cart. I even made little personalized bouquets for each place setting—a peony with a sprig of mint tied with a tag on which I had written everyone’s names in calligraphy.

Did I go a little overboard? Um, you could say that. In my defense, there’s really nothing I’d rather do than dive off the creative deep end in the name of spoiling my friends, and so, to me, the work was well worth the effort. I made their day, and that in turn made mine.

We’re all so damn busy that it’s hard not to slip into autopilot and simply skim the surface of our lives. Paying attention to the little things has the power to wake us up and catalyze big shifts in our perspective. Think about the ah-ha moments you’ve experienced in your yoga practice, for example, when you found yourself plunged into a deeper level of understanding; chances are your growth was inspired by a subtle adjustment or a nuanced instruction that suddenly changed everything.

That said, attention to detail takes work; in my case, it meant spending my Friday evening ironing linen napkins! It can’t always be fancy china and homemade quiche, and besides, even the most beautiful party lacks meaning if our efforts are only half-baked. Yoga asks us to cultivate presence—to apply our whole self to the task at hand. Whether it’s a party with plastic cups or crystal glasses, what matters above all is the quality of our attention in the moment.

It’s important that we take time to invest in the little things, be it in our yoga practice, our relationships, or our creative passions. That kind of heartfelt mindfulness brings tremendous richness to life. Krishnamurti wrote, “Attention is love.” How do you show the people you love just how much you care about them? How has your attention to detail inspired meaning in your life?